NOTE: The May blog posts will not be updated this month, but check back soon for new updates.

  • Are You Unconsciously Judging Homelessness?

    Particularly at this time of year, we see those that may be homeless, living on the streets, moving between temporary shelters, including houses of friends, family and emergency accommodations. The legal definition of homelessness varies from country to country, or among different jurisdictions in the same country or region. People who are homeless are most often unable to acquire and maintain regular, safe, protected and adequate housing due to income that is inconsistent or lacking altogether. Homelessness and poverty are interrelated. Some are specialized veterans, now in a state of psychological unrest.

    Without thought, many of our citizens view these individuals as deadbeats, disenfranchised from society or even, mentally ill. Often these adjectives are untrue and the circumstances that have propelled them into instability are beyond their control.

    For the coming holidays, try adding your support to this group for housing, meals, and recycled clothing. Your efforts don’t have to solve the entire nation’s problems only solve one day’s needs for a homeless person.

    Do good and be kind.

     

    “There is a lot that happens around the world we cannot control. We cannot stop earthquakes, we cannot prevent droughts, and we cannot prevent all conflict, but when we know where
    the hungry, the homeless and the sick exist, then we can help.”
    Jan Schakowsky

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  • How Accessible Are You Now?

    We as a society have spent the last 2 years locking down and staying in our home, sometimes with tremendous isolation. As well documented from the virus around the world. This can promote feelings of loneliness, total separation from family and friends; and even, feeling as if you are in solitary confinement.

    With those that feel anxious, more anxiety we feel, the more frequent the beta brain waves. In this state, it is rare to have an “innovative” thought. We are mostly processing information and going from task to task analytically. When most people are asked where they have their most innovative thoughts, they seldom say “at work.” Our left-brained analytical environments induce beta brain waves which do not lead to creative thought.

    We are all part of an infinite ocean of vitality, love, and joy. Yet when we’re caught in the turmoil of an agitated mind or heart, our access to those unbounded sources is obscured. While it’s natural for our emotions to ebb and flow, if we are consistently feeling depleted, stuck, depressed, or even “comfortably” numb, then it’s very likely that we are holding onto something that is no longer serving us. In the solation we’ve had, we might be hanging onto a painful memory, or negative beliefs that drain our life energy and prevents us from experiencing our inherent happiness.

    How does this make you accessible now to family and friends, especially if phone or email is all you have for correspondence? Taking some time to tune into your inner wisdom, you will find the guidance that will help you release your stored emotional toxicity and rediscover happiness – even if you have been carrying your burden of pain for quite some time. Here is a simple but powerful process that you can use:

    Begin by taking a few minutes to quiet your mind, then ask the question What am I not dealing with in my life? Consider each of your important relationships and listen to the messages of comfort or discomfort your body is sending. If the message is one of distress, ask yourself What do I need to do to reduce or eliminate this distress? For most non-nourishing relationships, you have three choices: change it, release it, or continue to suffer. Once you’ve made your choices conscious, it is much more difficult to choose to suffer.

    You can always find plenty of reasons to stay with the known rather than exploring the unknown, yet if your current choices aren’t bringing you happiness and fulfillment, it’s time to change your direction or accept the consequences. To be more accessible as we come out of this terrible period of Covid, remember that as the author of your life, if you don’t like the old script, you can write a new one.

    “Goodness is about character – integrity, honesty, kindness, generosity, moral courage, and the like. More than anything else, it is about how we treat other people.”
    Dennis Prager

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  • Are You Using Empathy in Your Communication?

    In today’s world of leadership, leaders are either hated and feared or appreciated and respected. Why? Most of them use empathy in their group and individual communications. They do not appear wimpy or afraid to pursue action when necessary, by using empathy in their language delivery.

    What do we mean by the use of empathy? Empathy is the capacity to understand or feel what another person is experiencing from within the presence of their situation. Definitions of empathy encompass a broad range of emotional states. Types of empathy include cognition, sensitiveness, somatic, and spiritual existence.

    Dr. Michael Alcee, a clinical psychologist with multiple TED Talks to his name, invokes Atticus Finch’s famous turn of phrase from To Kill a Mockingbird when describing empaths: “The empath has a profound empathic imagination, a capacity to know someone deeply … to ‘climb into his skin and walk around in it.’” According to Alcee, “Empathic leaders are well versed in the fluid nature of emotions, and how quickly they can move from one thing to the other, so they aren’t as judgmental of people’s changes. They are more supportive and encouraging of the other person’s process. The primary benefit of this empathic capacity is a richer, fuller, more nuanced appreciation for the strengths and flaws of others, and even a capacity to create a space so that new aspects of themselves can emerge and unfold.”

    Further Develop Your Empathic Communication Skills:

    • Augment your attention by practicing self-detachment in the conversation at hand.
    • Be more receptive to what the other person is saying.
    • Refrain from simply assessing the situation and giving suggestions to the speaker.
    • Increase your active listening skills by participating in what the other person states. Make all efforts to view the situation from their perspective.
    • Check whether what you heard and what the other person did not verbalize is correlate. Try not to make assumptions on what they intend.

    If you aren’t humble, whatever empathy you claim is false and probably results from some arrogance or the desire to control. But true empathy is rooted in humility and the understanding that there are many people with as much to contribute in life as you.
    Anand Mahindra

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  • Is Psychological Fullness or Richness Achievable?

    Studies have discovered that people with higher psychological well-being are more likely to live healthier and longer lives. They are also more likely to enjoy a better quality of life. Better psychological well-being is associated with fewer social problems. If there were a magic pill for promoting psychological fullness, would this pill be taken by everyone or only those that want happy life? Is happy richness and a meaningful life the same?

    Feeling capable and confident adds to psychological richness. One good way to evaluate richness is to remind yourself of the things you’re good at or the character strengths you possess. Reflect on your past achievements and the qualities that helped you succeed in getting to where you are now.

    And there are no equivalent avenues in life satisfaction or the meaning of life’s richness. The emotional elements of psychological richness can appear distinctly: people high in psychological richness state experiencing both positive and negative emotions more intensely. They appear to enjoy the ‘good’ moments when they are present; and they feel negative stress less. This could possibly be because they know that both instances are transitory. How often do you feel life is psychologically rich for you?

    “Goodness is about character – integrity, honesty, kindness, generosity, moral courage, and the like. More than anything else, it is about how we treat other people.”
    Dennis Prager

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  • Building Trust Takes Courage

    Doing what you say you are going to do is the first step toward building trust, and that’s simply about communication. What causes trust to be broken is pretty simple, happens when others begin to sense that you are more concerned about yourself than them. Trust is broken, especially now coming out of a world illness.

    Can it be rebuilt? Often, and it will take more to rebuild than you might think possible. The first step to rebuilding trust is to have sincere communication. To rebuild trust in the workplace, business communication demands that that you are honest and authentic. And then you absolutely positively have to do what you say you are going to do. Trust is all about communication,both verbal and the unspoken. Don’t be hesitate to take the courage to address the lack of trust, personally and professionally.

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